Divorce isn't easy on any family, but Psychology Today reports that children will ultimately be better off with two happily divorced parents than miserable married ones. It's possible for the divorce to be amicable, and you can agree to work out custody in a way that works for everyone if you keep communication open and choose to behave in a supportive way with one another. From the decision to divorce to appointments with your family law attorney to the time the court declares you legally divorced, try to stay positive. Along the way, try these ways of establishing new ways of being a positive co-parent with your ex.
Make and Keep Plans
In order to allow you and your ex to spend plenty of quality time with your children, it's important to be organized and make clear plans as co-parents. Do your best to always be on time and keep plans once they are established. The Arizona Chapter of the Association of Family and Conciliation Courts recommends that divorced parents use a 12-month, child-centered calendar to make plans that are in the best interests of your children.
Have Regular Family Meetings
Getting together for meetings as a family shows children that you and your ex are serious about remaining a supportive family unit. You can decide to do weekly or monthly family meetings, but try to be consistent. Plan to discuss how everyone is feeling about the changes that the divorce is bringing, and just allow children to vent when they need to do so.
Agree on How to Handle Future Relationships
Although you and your ex may not want to date anyone else for a long time after your divorce, you should discuss how to handle the situation when either of you starts dating. Try to agree on how much children should know regarding the dates a parent may go on. Discuss what is allowed within the home and how best to introduce children to new partners. Open communication can help alleviate anxiety and prevent anger because you both know what to expect in the future.
Finally, remember that the behavior that you and your ex model for your children will set the tone for how they deal with all the changes in the family dynamic. Remind your kids of your love for them each day and continue to try to keep communication open and healthy among all members of the family.
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